Let Your Kids Speak

This article is to give a shout out to all the employees, the world over who always have an ear and a smile. Those workers, in any job outlet, from retail workers, to wait staff, to professors, to teachers and more; the people who spend all day giving customer service to the fun customers and the not so fun customers. We are the people who might indirectly be saving the world.

So many times, I have watched parents with their tone of voice and body language shut down the interaction between themselves and an employee, with their children right in front of them! After you spend all day complaining to your child that they need more social interaction and need to shut off their cell phones, you are going to complain when they want to talk to someone in real life?

Part of the problem is, in my opinion that when we say, “Put that phone down!” what we really mean is, I want your childhood to be exactly like mine. We want to share those memories that we have of our youth with our children instead of making new memories. My wife can remember playing capture the flag at night with a whole neighborhood of kids. I can remember playing cops and robbers with my friends. But that isn’t the experience of today, unfortunately these seem like special occasion experiences now.

Children now connect via social media and while we don’t need to accept them being glued to their phones we do need to realize that this has an affect on superficial relationships, like the cashier at your grocery store or the retail worker in your shops. Us, older people have a problem with pleasant small talk because our parents taught us that “those people” are salesmen who want to swindle you. Millennials and younger people don’t understand this behavior. They are seeking to speak with “those people”. Remember: Your kids aren’t connecting with their friends like we used to.

These behaviors might be directly related to the amount of depression and suicides in young people today. If your child is on their phone constantly, they are almost certainly experiencing some form of negativity. This could be one or two nasty comments or a litany of nasty comments. It could even be not having enough engagement on their posts. Us, older generations, shrug this off as who cares? That’s not real life but it is for your child. When they turn away from the stresses of social media and what they feel is a rejection, they seek the real world experiences of superficial relationships.

The retail worker that smiles at your child and talks about makeup techniques with her for a half hour might just be saving her from the despair of suicide. The comic book clerk who debates your son over Marvel versus DC might just be saving him from plot he already thought out. This seems very extreme, doesn’t it? But social media produces extreme thoughts, behaviors and actions with very real life consequences.

All that I ask is that all us “really old people” make the effort to converse pleasantly with everyone you come in contact with. Don’t give your children those mixed signals. When you take them out, let they speak and interact with people, not alone because you’re there too, but with your supervision let them experience life outside of the phone. It may be their saving grace.

Dr. Luis C. Almeida is an associate professor of communication at Lee University. He is the author of the book “Becoming a Brand: The Rise of Technomoderation.” He can be reached via his website at luiscalmeida.info.)

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Digital Appearances Are Deceiving Too

Its virtually impossible to really know what people are up to based on what they post on twitter. In this article, I will explain to you why the former is true with a touch of Dr. A’s personality.

Ladies and gents, let’s get real. People use a mask in public and in cyberspace. If a person is sharing happy looking pictures on instagram all the time, chances are that they are de facto sad not happy most if not all the time. People often share the opposite of what they are really thinking. People may even compensate for being sad by posting happy content. Let me give you another example. If a person decides to engage in a rant conversation with a colleague or a friend online, chances are that this person is probably afraid to engage in a face-to-face conversation with somebody. As you, me and all the Tennessee Titans Fans know, most people put a mask when they behave in public. Do you think that facebook is any different? Please.

We all know that, don’t we? Why pretend then? Or assume one thing and ignore what we know about how we typically behave in public? Listen to Dr. A: Who cares what people think of you on facebook. You must live your life and make these social media networks be subordinated to you. You won’t gain anything by playing Nostradamus based on what people post on instagram. The only thing you will gain are the headaches of gossip which is an activity condemned by God.

  

Let’s get real here. How do you really know what people are feeling or thinking if intonations and variations in voice pitch, for example, aren’t being shared in social media posts anyways? See why it isn’t possible to guess who people really are online? Look, there are so many ways a person can misinterpret another person’s message on instagram that it isn’t even funny. Which body language is a person using when they “communicate” with you on linkedIn? Well, we don’t really know, do we? It is only by speaking face-to-face with somebody that you can be sure of what they are trying to communicate to you and others. I’m convinced of that.

There are so many people today investigating people’s facebook accounts these days and forming opinions about them based on what they post on a blog without having a clue about what their true intent for posting that piece of content was. It’s an epidemic. It is such a common practice that I have a micro system who checks who is actually looking at my profile on a daily basis. I’m watching you! 

It isn’t easy to “know” who people are simply by sneakily going to a person’s facebook page and analyze what they post. People may have an idea who the person is or may be but I’m doubtful that a person can really know who people truly are by doing a content analysis of what people share online.  People post content for different reasons.One of my buddies in Brazil shares jokes on a daily basis on his facebook. Does this behavior make him a social media clown? I don’t think so. Not to me. I know him better.

Remember: Not everything you see is what it seems. Social media isn’t any different. Just because a person posts too many times on facebook doesn’t mean that he or she is self centered. Maybe, they are sharing more content because their parents want to see more photos of their children on their wall. Perhaps, people don’t post as much because they hate technology. Maybe they made a vow to technomoderate that year. How can people really know, right?

Be careful with assumptions. They tend to backfire. I honestly don’t think that anybody can truly guess who people are online without knowing who they are offline. People can try but they will fall short. The complexities of communication and human behavior can’t be diminished to a level of perishable machinery.  We are humans! We are living systems! Knowing how people really are is dependent on other variables not found in cyberspace and that’s a fact.

I have 10 Life Secrets: Let Me Share 1.

I have 10 Life Secrets: Let Me Share 1.

Most people don’t get what they want or deserve because of silly mistakes. I have met a number of talented college graduates who struggle economically because of the bridges they’ve burned along the way, experienced professionals who get stuck mid career because of pride, and near retirement employees who are anxious to retire so that their fear of unemployment stops consuming them. Clearly, nobody told these folks that jobs are now partnerships and that burning bridges, pride and fear are only going to slowly transform their true talent into perishable mediocrity. You don’t want to fall under these categories. What you do need is to control your life by maneuvering the game of life in ways that makes you totally unpredictable. By the way, how are you positioning yourself these days? Are you engaging in careful planning?

Undeniably, everybody loves doing the kind of work that they have a talent for. Based on this logic, the million dollar question then becomes, “What do I need to do in order to work on my talent?” Ladies and gentleman, I am going to reveal to you one of the ten life secrets I’ve learned right now. The secret actually comes from Napoleon Hill, one of my “deceased mentors” and author of the book “Think and Grow Rich.” Just realize that his secret has seven steps. Are you ready for this?

First: Decide exactly what kind of job you want. If this job doesn’t already exist, perhaps you can create it.

Second: Choose the company or individual from whom you wish to work for.

Third: Study your prospective employer, as to policies, personnel, and chances for advancement.

Fourth: By analysis of yourself, your talents and capabilities, figure what you can offer, and plan ways and means of giving advantages, services, developments, and ideas that you believe you can successfully deliver.

Fifth: Forget about a “job.” Forget whether or not there is an opening. Forget the usual routine of “have you got a job for me?” Concentrate on what you can give.

Sixth: Once you have your plan in mind, arrange with an experienced writer to put it on paper in neat form and in full detail.

Seventh: Present it to the proper person with authority and he will do the rest. Every company is looking for men who can give something of value, whether it be ideas, services, or “connections.” Every company has room for the man who has a definite plan of action which is to the advantage of that company.

Careful planning is at the core of this secret. Failing to influence others is a capital mistake. Never, under any circumstances, criticize others because the moment you do you lose them. Who knows if you are going to need them in the future or not? Don’t burn bridges! Control your pride. Life is about God, not you or me. Why are you so afraid? Life is full of surprises. You might as well join the team and make yourself indispensable to whoever you work for. Your anxieties will decrease… trust me.

It is all about careful planning, dude. By the way, what are you doing about that? Don’t let others choose what you should do. You should take ownership of your destiny perhaps with the consultation of a close ally. The former can help you tremendously, that is for sure.

 

Five Ways To Serve

Five Ways To Serve

Do you know that God has given you a number of gifts for you to serve Him and others? It is amazing what you can do when you dedicate your life to Christ. He can do miracles through you, I say. In this blog, we are going to discuss how your gifts can be used for service.

In Romans 12:9-13, we learn, Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”

It is worth noticing that God does talk about the importance of hating what is evil, honor one another above ourselves and the importance of serving God. What am I saying? I am saying that God commands us to love and serve! We might as well follow His lead. In reality, there are many ways we can serve. Let me share with you fie ways you can serve.

  1. Serve God above all things by engaging in the great commission.
  2. Serve your family by being available and helpful.
  3. Serve your church and help them to spread the word of God.
  4. serve your community by volunteering.
  5. Serve your neighbor as you do yourself.

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Are you ready to serve? Are you excited about engaging in this important task for God? Never, under any circumstances, give love away. Always be with God and cultivate a heart for service. The former is what we were called to do. God bless.

Do No Evil…

Do No Evil…

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“Now finally, all of you should be likeminded and sympathetic, should love believers, and be compassionate and humble, not paying back evil for evil or insult for insult but, on the contrary, giving a blessing since you were called for this, so that you can inherit a blessing” (1 Peter 3:8-9).  

Under any circumstances, do no evil. In this life, we must live a life for the Lord not for men. God is pretty clear about how He wants us to behave and live our lives. Acting evil in either words spoken or behaviors is to be forbidden. Don’t insult others — Be sympathetic, be compassionate, and humble, as Peter has taught us. In every opportunity, do what you can do make others feel good and above all, obey God’s law. The former is our task.

The world is full of injustice, mean spirited people and arrogant individuals who think they are wonderful. Be different today! Be a Christian! Be the salt of the world and by your actions… be a testimony of the love of Jesus Christ to the nations. We need to show others that only God saves and is merciful. Without God, we aren’t anything.

That God be glorified!

Listen Carefully: The Lord Will Never Abandon You.

Listen Carefully: The Lord Will Never Abandon You.

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“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged for the Lord your God will be with you whenever you go” (Joshua 1:9).  

Tomorrow, I will officially starting my job at Lee University which in itself has been an answer to prayer. Our family isn’t in Cleveland, TN because of an academic promotion or anything financial. In fact, a lot of our friends questioned why our family decided to move to another institution in another state making less money and with me losing two university tenures… “Professor, did you lose your mind?”

Well, our family decided to handle the former with the following response, “We didn’t lose our mind, no. Our family literally lives life by faith.” We don’t own anything — The Lord does. God will provide… The Lord has called us to move to Lee University for a very good reason.

We are not afraid of our move and you shouldn’t be afraid to move to a new place when God calls you to move either. Life isn’t about living in fear. The purpose of life is to glorify God and to follow His commands. What we do is judged by others but I can assure you that God won’t leave you alone in your life journey. There is a reason for everything under the sun as we learn in Ecclesiastes 3.

The time is now not tomorrow. We are all terminal as my pastor once said. Time is running out to do the great things that the Lord has called you to do. Question: Are you doing what the Lord has called you to do? Don’t wait! It is time to serve and be with Him. God won’t abandon you.

He will be with you whenever you go! God’s blessings brothers and sisters. Only God is to be glorified. In His name we pray… Amen.

True Wisdom Comes From God.

True Wisdom Comes From God.

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“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him” (James 1:5); ” Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil” (Proverbs 3:7). 

True wisdom comes from God. All we have to do is to task Him and he shall give it to us. Our God is a generous Lord who cares and wants us to grow spiritually. The idea that we can be wise in our own eyes doesn’t come from our creator. Ask and you will receive! With God, everything is possible. God blessings to you brothers and sisters.

On Marriage, Sex, and Family.

On Marriage, Sex, and Family.

Leviticus 19:32: “Stand up in the presence of the elderly, and show respect for the aged. Fear your God. I am the LORD…” 1 Peter 5:5: “Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Timothy 5:1-3: “Never speak harshly to an older man, but appeal to him respectfully as you would to your own father. Talk to younger men as you would to your own brothers. Treat older women as you would your mother, and treat younger women with all purity as you would your own sisters. Take care of any widow who has no one else to care for her.”

We need to respect those who are older than us who possess wisdom. Listen to Dr. Beaty. He knows what he is doing. To God be the glory!

Say No To Astrology.

Say No To Astrology.

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God has cautioned us against the dangers of astrology in Deuteronomy verses 4:19, 18:9-12, and Daniel 2:2-17. Seeking guidance from a star isn’t exactly what a Christian is supposed to do. Astrology is idolatry plain and simple and is highly condemned by God. Back in the old testament, the prophet Isaiah declared that he who who practices this craft won’t be able to save themselves or anybody else. God also warns us all about such practices in 1 corinthians 6:-9-10 declaring that anyone who engages in astrology won’t inherited the kingdom of God. We are to flee from such practices, period. We need to seek guidance from God and celebrate His name.