Never Let Anyone Mistreat You.

Self Portrait

In this life, you will eventually be mistreated. Mistreatment might find you by accident, will be initiated by your enemies, sometimes will be revealed by friends, even close friends, co-workers, and often by some of the members of your family. The reason why I am so certain about the former is because most people are egoistic, self-centered and believe that life is all about themselves. Ego plays a large role, if you know what I mean. The bigger someone’s ego is, the higher the levels of mistreatment. It is clear cut.

The moment that people realize that they are at a deficit, be aware, because they will eventually find a way to mistreat you directly or indirectly once, maybe multiples times a week. Be aware: Life is all about them not you. They might celebrate your successes once in a while but in the end, work is about them. Sometimes, you have no option but to leave the environment and let these egocentric maniacs up to their own devices trying to maximize their retirement checks on the shoulders of others. It is an ugly world out there. It happens to us all everywhere. Don’t be judgmental and specific. Stop!

One thing is for sure: Mistreatment is just one of the ways evil people retaliate against others and it can take many forms. Mistreatment is easily observed and felt and can be described systematically. In reality, there are a number of cues associated with grotesque interpersonal mistreatment. People might mistreat you by simply speaking sarcastically towards you, by gossiping against you behind your back to others, and many times by screaming or confronting you head on with mean words, actions, and non-verbal clues. Some even write ALL CAPS WORDS to belittle you.

Micromanaging is a form of mistreatment. Whenever you suspect that spies are sent out there to give intelligence about you to the source, you reached the pinnacle of toxicity and mistreatment in a group, club or organization. Nobody who is truly a Christian, is nice or has any integrity, sends spies out there to gather intelligence on you for self gain. The former is better described by Aristotelian Scholars as manipulative and insecure often incompetent individuals who are often hiding something. It is a learned behavior that is easily displayed and caught. Just because people decide to be quiet about the former doesn’t mean that they don’t know.

Stopping someone from making progress is a well known mistreatment tactic used by individuals with authority to slow talent down. Flooding a unit with unreasonable requests at the last minute is both poor planning and usually a strategy to set people up for failure. Keep this in mind — life is about timing and effort. If you change someone’s timing, many times these changes will be for the worse leading to temporary conquest. No wonder why football coaches often stop decisive games in critical moments in an attempt to disrupt their opponent’s timing leading to error. No matter the form, you will be mistreated in this life. In fact, it isn’t a question of if you will be mistreated. It is a question of when. There are a number of ways you can ensure that you won’t be mistreated long term. In this article, I will share with you three ways to confront mistreatment at the source.

  1. Don’t be political. Be straightforward and firm.  Some people might and probably will assume a lot of things about you and temporarily mistreat you on this basis alone. However, the moment you firmly confront those who mistreat you one-on-one, without being political or being politically correct, mistreatment will flee away from you, you will flee from that person or group of people or both. At that exact moment, you will be able to judge if the mistreatment was a misunderstanding, was an innocent mistake, was mean spirited or an act done by a coward. It is amazing what people revel under stress. Look out for the details and act objectively not emotionally. Don’t be political. You don’t have to. Be straightforward and firm. Be the person who calls the bluff. Give them back a dosage of their own poison. Chances are high that they will think twice before treating you poorly again, at least for a while. Don’t let anyone bully you, ever.
  2.  Create alliances and peripheral support.  As the proverb goes, “The world goes around and around…” If you are being mistreated by a player or a group in a system, chances are high that other members and units belonging to your macro system are also being mistreated as well. The good news is that generalized, or should I say, purposeful systemic mistreatment calls for organized union affiliation. You need to create alliances and peripheral support in order to retaliate back and cause quantifiable damage. Here is the good news: Your opponent grows weaker and weaker when confronting a unified and concentrated force. He/she (or they) will pay a big price for mistreating you because the result of that backfire will cost the coward(s) a high price which often includes his/her (their) reputation. Mistreating others will only result in rash retaliation many times fired by a consortium.
  3. Look for alternatives and leave. There are times when you just have to leave and let others fix their own problems with their own resources. We live in a free and wonderful country that allows us to have choices. Nobody is obligated to stay in any establishment anywhere in the United States if he/she doesn’t want to. I personally don’t believe in quitting any appointment unexpectedly or in bad terms with any organization because life is about building bridges not burning them. The former isn’t to say that you should be married to a bad situation for twenty years or accept unreasonable terms forever. Sometimes, the best and right thing to do is to break affiliation and fulfill the destiny that God has planned for you elsewhere. There is more to life than trying to fix the broken if you break in the process.  Look for alternatives and leave even if you lose some funds in the process. Money comes and goes… You should control your destiny.

In this life, you will eventually be mistreated. The reason why I am so certain about the former is because most people are egoistic, self-centered and believe that life is all about themselves. Mistreatment is easily observed and felt and can be described systematically. The best way to tackle mistreatment is by being proactive.  Don’t be political. Be straightforward and firm. Create alliances and peripheral support. Sometimes, the best thing to do is to look for alternatives and leave. Don’t be afraid to make a big move. I have done a big one before and will do it again if necessary and you should do as well if required. Be a person of principles and stick to what you value and believe. Never let anyone or any group mistreat you. Confront them back accordingly your way.

 

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